Thursday, August 26, 2004
i realised many many things today.
my friends.... and her....
everything is going wrong.
my patience for her..
my determination for her..
everything juz went down the drain..
somewhat,
i got the feeling that,
no matter how long i wait.
she is never gonna turn to me.
i never knew perserverance could bring me so much pain.
i feel the pain now.
i really do.
i never felt so rejected before...
todayy.
i know how INSIGNIFICANT i am..
i mean nothing..
absolute nothing.
my friends told me she wants me to give up.
i felt numb.
i wanted to express how i felt.
but i CANT!
i was loss at words.
and then i knew..
my efforts gone to waste.
i couldn't make up my mind.
i wouldn't want to.
i want the way i always dreamed of ...
it could never be that way..
.... never ....
god will never be so nice to me.
i'm tiredd..
i really am..
i never felt like this before.
but why to her?
why things wouldn't turn out the way i want?
-she... beats me in everything.
-she... is insensitive.
-she... is not the way i want her to be.
-she... takes me for granted.
-she...leaves me alone in a dark world.
-she... is my friend.....................................
am tiredd//
i need her//
i need a shoulder for me to cry on//
i need to rest//
Qing Ying; 4:45 PM